The Evil Queen

"Something tells me Isabella's Anarchist Grandma Julie would enjoy knowing that I told her (1) I'm not scared of the Evil Queen, (2)  I don't care what the Evil Queen thinks and (3) I will tell the Evil Queen this next time I see her. "

 

I got this email today from the wonderful friend who fell in love with my grand daughter as soon as she met her. Bella was only weeks or months old. They have had a powerful good friendship for 5 years. I had a bunch of reactions to this, aside from gratitude that Bella feels the courage of a strong woman when she faces her fears.

The first is a haunting distaste for Walt Disney who mutilated some of the best fairy tales in the world. I remember my oldest daughter having 'bad dreams' after seeing Snow White. I went and read the Grimm's version and the insidious change Disney had made was leaving a slight ambiguity at the end about whether or not the Evil Queen was dead or maybe had just been chased away for the time being. In the original story, you are not left with the feeling that she might pop out from behind a tree on a dark night. I can see how a cliff hanger might leave room for sequels and be a profitable notion, but I do feel badly for the children who suffer fear from these movies. Creating that fear is a bit evil in itself.

 

I am trying to remember my first fears and I am not coming up with any very early memories. I do have a memory of a slightly paralyzing fear moment. My mother had told us that ammonia was poison and we weren't to touch the bottle. Then, one day, she washed the woodwork around my door with that very poison. I was deathly afraid to walk through the door. I pretty much figured that Mom was trying to get rid of us, and if I left the room it would be all over.  She finally missed me and came to see what was going on. She walked right through the doorway. When she did not die instantly, I let go of my fear. I do remember that.

 

Last summer in Oregon I took walks with a friend who had a one year old daughter. This child was so petrified of dogs, that when she heard a dog barking far away, she would go stiff with panic. One day we went to a little local fair and I bought her a ride around the grass on a pony. We were pretty sure she wouldn't go near the pony, but why not try? She got on the pony and went around the ring waving one arm high in the air. When she got off there was a German Shepherd  dog right near her. She waved at the dog and said, "Hi dog."

What happened there? I was elated at seeing her have so big a change so fast. I hope Bella takes courage from her friend and I hope she never meets the Evil Witch in real life. (I certainly have met one or two in my days.) I guess the more interesting question is how we get rid of fears rather than how we collect them.