Freedom from is differrent from freedom to. Our choice.

What does it mean to be able to count on a friend or family member? One way we know each other is knowing how the other person will react in a given situation. One measure of this is morality. I don't mean judgmental Old Testament morality based on punitive ideas like "An eye for an eye" kind of thinking. I guess I mean moral fiber. A friend is true to themselves.

If a person is dedicated to loving kindness, then that shows through all their deeds and words. If a person is loyal, they are first loyal to their own truth. One of the worst experiences we can endure is betrayal. In my experience, I can work on forgiveness (Forgiveness is for me. Forgiveness set me free), but I have lines that can not be crossed in my relationships with others.

My friends are extremely diverse, but the keepers are those whom I can trust to be solidly who they are. Making a mistake in a friendship can really hurt. Sometimes this happens in moments of infatuation. I was with a guy who had been involved with someone new before he broke off his current relationship three times before we got together. Guess what happened to us? He was consistent. I was blind.

I have been around people who have gotten into friendships pretty heavily when one or the other partner was an addict (or both were ) and then been deeply hurt when one partner has gotten healthy and the other has not. This has to happen and it has to hurt.When people are fucked up, they do fucked up things. There is a lot of hurt and a lot of betrayal. It is in the nature of things.

Our choice is in our understanding of what works for us. From my highly evolved heights, I now chose not to be with people who hurt me or others. Not to imply that people can't change, but to say that I have a choice in these matters. We can't be of service to the world if we are filled with anger and resentment. We can't bring joy when we can't find it in ourselves.

For me, it is a great blessing and a gift when another person sets me free by crossing my moral line in the sand. I can then focus on situations in which friends can be there for each other and bring out the best in each other during good times and difficult times.